Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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