i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
