Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
