im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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