do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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