Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
