I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
