I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Randomize
