What did we do last night that was yellow?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize