So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
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Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
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You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
All I want is dick and wine.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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