Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
