Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
