i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
