Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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