Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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