like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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