theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize