Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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