I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize