This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize