i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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