She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
