My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize