I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
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