She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.