i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Randomize
