Texts From Last Night

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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad

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  (570): Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad http://tfl.nu/w1l4
  Replies (47) Good night (1203) Bad night (20265) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to

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  (604): her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to http://tfl.nu/r2n2
  Replies (25) Good night (432) Bad night (3428) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?

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  (608): hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests? http://tfl.nu/uq87
  Replies (17) Good night (516) Bad night (4654) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.

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  (720): I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch. http://tfl.nu/l2v2
  Replies (23) Good night (4941) Bad night (571) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.

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  (217): Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation. http://tfl.nu/9spz
  Replies (14) Good night (9342) Bad night (600) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.

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  (613): You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese. http://tfl.nu/lvqg
  Replies (9) Good night (4560) Bad night (773) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?

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  (617): what date should I let him know how fucked up I am? http://tfl.nu/6aws
  Replies (17) Good night (1159) Bad night (4068) Order T-Shirt
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.

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  (251): Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call. http://tfl.nu/u2ur
  Replies (8) Good night (1208) Bad night (3968) Order T-Shirt
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.

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  (403): Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl. http://tfl.nu/u7lt
  Replies (22) Good night (4300) Bad night (1346) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  ...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.

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  (818): ...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread. http://tfl.nu/b6oj
  Replies (11) Good night (2513) Bad night (737) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday

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  (727): I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday http://tfl.nu/mihk
  Replies (3) Good night (1983) Bad night (625) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  Thanks, mom.

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  (513): Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection! (1-513): Thanks, mom. http://tfl.nu/k49b
  Replies (17) Good night (3909) Bad night (1079) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  lets go back to having secrets in our friendship

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  (651): raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win (608): lets go back to having secrets in our friendship http://tfl.nu/pq7s
  Replies (6) Good night (3021) Bad night (628)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...

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  (817): No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex... http://tfl.nu/th3v
  Replies (7) Good night (1458) Bad night (414) Order T-Shirt
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.

  (1-563): View more from Iowa

  I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.

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  (563): The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers. (1-563): I desperately wanted to wear your shirt. http://tfl.nu/ni9x
  Replies (3) Good night (1018) Bad night (283)

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