I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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