is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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