but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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