Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
