she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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