I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
