He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize