No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Help. Why am I so naked?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
