girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Randomize
