Buhtt sex?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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