I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Randomize