He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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