you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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