How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize