Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
My vagina is very pro this idea
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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