Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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