id be glad to
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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