im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
