Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me

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  (212): that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me http://tfl.nu/xacv
  Replies (22) Good night (1296) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.

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  (727): He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple. http://tfl.nu/vn0p
  Replies (34) Good night (973) Bad night (12496)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!

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  (502): Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!! http://tfl.nu/qcph
  Replies (42) Good night (1078) Bad night (20249)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.

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  (937): I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird. http://tfl.nu/7edr
  Replies (66) Good night (756) Bad night (5169)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.

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  (847): No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv. http://tfl.nu/ej96
  Replies (38) Good night (1795) Bad night (4182)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis

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  (267): I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis http://tfl.nu/zmb9
  Replies (21) Good night (1056) Bad night (3556)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.

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  (410): we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice. http://tfl.nu/ow0x
  Replies (5) Good night (898) Bad night (2845)
• Favorite

  (432): View more from Texas

  Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.

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  (432): Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know. http://tfl.nu/dusl
  Replies (5) Good night (1335) Bad night (2830)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.

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  (519): ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar. http://tfl.nu/yprb
  Replies (5) Good night (2425) Bad night (1017)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.

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  (315): The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk. http://tfl.nu/v27u
  Replies (3) Good night (2814) Bad night (834)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you

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  (303): The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you http://tfl.nu/278m
  Replies (19) Good night (1326) Bad night (2499)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.

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  (615): You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it. http://tfl.nu/hvow
  Replies (4) Good night (1696) Bad night (568)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis

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  (360): Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis http://tfl.nu/354f
  Replies (2) Good night (904) Bad night (672)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.

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  (773): Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that. http://tfl.nu/tp3a
  Replies (8) Good night (1410) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.

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  (443): There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity. http://tfl.nu/z2pz
  Replies (12) Good night (351) Bad night (1600)

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