Texts From Last Night

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  (727): View more from Florida

  My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo

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  (727): My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo http://tfl.nu/tgva
  Replies (38) Good night (901) Bad night (4752)
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  (818): View more from California

  Its about making memories worth repressing

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  (818): Its about making memories worth repressing http://tfl.nu/5fiw
  Replies (1) Good night (2818) Bad night (668)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins

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  (303): then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins http://tfl.nu/bn73
  Replies (68) Good night (6168) Bad night (776)
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  (762): View more from Georgia

  Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.

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  (762): Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please. http://tfl.nu/mnuz
  Replies (52) Good night (5415) Bad night (714)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.

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  (864): We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us. http://tfl.nu/xmtc
  Replies (20) Good night (1080) Bad night (6155)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.

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  (413): Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever. http://tfl.nu/3v3s
  Replies (54) Good night (8914) Bad night (1549)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?

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  (209): Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on? http://tfl.nu/ru4x
  Replies (20) Good night (3732) Bad night (1417)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though

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  (505): I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though http://tfl.nu/889i
  Replies (9) Good night (1071) Bad night (2475)
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  (716): View more from New York

  You can't have your penis and eat it, too.

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  (716): You can't have your penis and eat it, too. http://tfl.nu/3eoi
  Replies (14) Good night (2446) Bad night (1206)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.

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  (518): I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon. http://tfl.nu/pj69
  Replies (9) Good night (1287) Bad night (3502)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye

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  (781): No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye http://tfl.nu/qnov
  Replies (12) Good night (1160) Bad night (2854)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?

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  (773): what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture? http://tfl.nu/g8fq
  Replies (4) Good night (899) Bad night (1518)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party

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  (602): The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party http://tfl.nu/nvop
  Replies (2) Good night (1029) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  L'Shannah Tovah!

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Whats that? My new stripper name?

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  (214): L'Shannah Tovah! (832): Whats that? My new stripper name? http://tfl.nu/9zli
  Replies (3) Good night (595) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway

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  (401): I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway http://tfl.nu/g36h
  Replies (3) Good night (835) Bad night (272)

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