Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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