I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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