I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
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It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
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i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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