Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
