Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
