we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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